I have been doing workouts with a personal trainer for full 4 months now.  =)  I am rather proud of myself that I actually stuck through it, despite the aches and pains and soreness and ouchness and walking funny sometimes, and ya, the money.  Geez, the money burns fast with two sessions a week.  But I stuck with it, because I realized after the first month that this was the best investment I ever had.

I could have saved the money to get a new gadget every couple months.  Yup, it’s that expensive.  But what I got back from the whole thing is priceless.

Let me tell you my story.

I have never been overweight my whole life.  I had the opposite problem ever since I grew up; I had always been underweight.  Being petite in size and underweight, it meant there were a lot of sports I couldn’t do.  I couldn’t shoot balls from free throw line because I couldn’t jump high enough and my arms were not strong enough.  I couldn’t play volleyball well because well, again, lack of strength.  I couldn’t run very fast though my endurance was better than average in HS.   After college, my exercise level went down to almost zero.  The result was actually quite similar to people who are overweight.  I lacked energy and was easily tired.  With that, I wasn’t able to enjoy outdoor activities as much.  I wasn’t happy about not being able to go outdoor more, and became self aware that despite me being underweight, I was continuing to lose muscle and gain fat.  After a number of years, I no longer wore skirts or dresses because I did not like how I looked in them.  In a way, I quit being a girl.

At some point in life, I decided enough is enough.  I wanted to change this and I thought that I can.  I didn’t exactly know what I wanted to achieve at the end.  My goal was just to lose a bit fat, gain some lean muscles, and gain weight while doing it.  I didn’t even know how to get there.  I just made up my mind last December, that’s what I am going to do.

I signed up for 24 Hours Fitness on December 31st last year (early start on New Year’s resolution), and decided I wanted and needed a personal trainer to help me get started.  Before that, I hadn’t exercised  for 8 years.  I mean, I hadn’t walked for more than 20 min at a time the past 8 years, and that happened probably 2 times a year max.   I didn’t know what exercise I should do, how long I should do, how to increase the load so I wouldn’t hurt myself.  So, I did; I signed up for personal training.

First session was hard.  I was breathing heavy, sweating like a pig, and heart racing so fast that I lost track of it.  I was in a bad shape; I didn’t think I would be able to come back for the 2nd session.  Luckily, my trainer was a young guy who’s energetic, encouraging, and knew how to motivate and “trick” me into pushing myself every session.  I learned to do core exercises as well as with free weights and machines.  Every session was a challenge.  There were always new exercises or increasing difficulties; never a dull moment and never a session that I didn’t think his ultimate goal was to break me (j/k).  The trainer also taught me how and what to eat, which was something I never thought much about.  I have a sweet tooth.  So the eating healthy part is actually harder than exercising more for me.   So far, I managed to cut down from desserts/ice cream/chocolate/sweets every night to at most once a week in small amount, and for the past 4 months I have never been to a fast food place.

I got to say I am not working and eating as “best” as I can or should yet, but the result is in.  I am starting to see some muscles and my endurance level improved dramatically.  From having trouble walking even 20 minutes to being able to walk for 6 hours, I am proud of myself. =)  Something unexpected happened while I exercised.  I got more energy, and I become happier as a person.  I smile more and laugh more, because I have energy now for work AND to have fun with friends.  Because I am proud of my hard work, I have more self confidence.  And, for the first time in years, I am not afraid to pick up a dress and put it on.   BTW, I still don’t have model-like body, or tight abs, slender legs whatever, but I am happy about myself now.  It’s like finding myself again.  I don’t need somebody to tell me that I look different, because I already feel the difference mentally.

After all these years, I am happy about myself, and happy with myself, finally.